And I Darken – The Conqueror Saga #1 ( Kiersten White ) Book discussion / review / rant-ish

Lada my lil dragon <3

Lada my lil dragon ❤

Overall: 4 out of 5 stars ★★★★


Bloody hell.

This book is astonishingly fucked up in the possible-best-entertaining-way evah ww

And it re-realizing me again and again, how human and their politics, needs to ‘tamed’ others crushed the real purpose of ‘religion’. I cringe so much every time the story told how christian/church felt so cold yet prideful and distant.. It shouldn’t be that way, it should be open to everyone, the lost one, the normal one, or the already loving-God one. But nowadays religion felt more like a tools to strengthen some particular ‘community’’s power to gather and control others, violently 😦

Enough talk with the religion, let’s go deep with the characters.


The romance part wasn’t exactly my fave in this book. Not that it’s really bad, it’s just I’m allergic to polygamy system :’) The inevitable harem system and how Mehmed fulfilled his so called ‘duty’ is a bit of a bummer for me ;;w;;


The politics elements is pretty thick. Specially how they pictured the ‘real insider’ that controls everything without even being public about that. How sneaky the kingdom actually is, nothing works as how it being public ;;


I’m not really familiar with the Vlad / Ottoman history before reading this one, (not even after lol, sorry)


Lada and Radu’s childhood is not an easy one, well, everybody have their own rough childhood.

But still, they endured a lot.

In the end, when Radu and Lada finally realized they only have each other in the end (excluding Mehmed, even tho BOTH of ‘em loved him), they’re their only family.


Lada’s adornment that change to ‘hate’ for his father hit me hard.

It’s pretty bizarre already for me to see that Lada want to make her father proud of her in the first place. In the end, she finally realized her ‘father’ is a weakling, not in the same terms as her mother is. But still, he’s not the ‘real’ prince he (she even) thought he is..


The way Lada see her mom is pretty fucked up too, it can’t be helped tho.

Her mom INDEED weak, physically and mentally. Maybe not that weak mentally, since she did survived being Vlad’s wife. But she did put no effort whatsoever for her children. Again, not blaming her for what she did / NOT do, it’s just a fact that she have no more love left for her children, and it’s understandable for Lada to feel that way to her mom..


The way each chara feel/think for each other really digs up the nastiest part of me, and my surrounding. Put it harsh reality right into my face. But this is a book, so it’s entertaining nevertheless


I was excited to find Mehmed and these 2 dorks finally met each other and became friend.

But towards the end, when Lada finally realized what she thinks of him, how mehmed thinks of her, and how RADU feels about all of it, including HIS OWN feeling.

Daaammnnn, complicated is not even enough for this situation.


I’m still confused (and a lil bit disgusted maybe) when Mehmed tried to ‘explain’ his excuse about the harem, and said it was a ‘duty’ for him. I know it’s 1400-ish at that time. But still, pain is pain, I can’t even start to imagine how Lada feels when she found out he had ANOTHER child.


I personally feel Mehmed is not going to be good for Lada to be honest.

Nobody in that book (at least the first book) is ‘equal’ enough for her. I know Mehmed did look at her as HIS equal, but if u think about it, did HE really is her equal? I mean, in a sense of Lada is actually ‘higher/bigger’ that Mehmed actually is.

Since this is still the first book, I kinda hoped Mehmed will be her first love(maybe) but will eventually found someone who can loved Lada and give her her freedom/power at the same time.

And I hope it won’t clashed with Radu again haha

I do hope for Radu to find his own happiness too. Seems like it’ll be tougher for him than Lada in this terms. He needs to be kinda ‘sneaky’ too actually, or someone else would use it as a weapon to him ;;


So excited to see the sequel, when finally Lada back in Wallachia, her land, her mother.

Who else would encounter her journey there ////


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